Nov 29, 2011

Luigi's Mansion 2

So, as 2012 is rapidly closing in, very soon we will see Luigi's Mansion's belated sequel on the 3DS, if the 3DS is still around.


I honestly don't think that it will be THAT great of a game, but not a terrible game, seeing as I know how hard it is to make a sequel after such a gap like this. Hey, Bionic Commando did great, and Golden Sun: Dark Dawn was great, too, but Luigi's mansion? Why not. Did I mention that the game is also transitioning from a home console to a handheld? Well, I bet Nintendo will be able to pull it off. Maybe.

Nov 26, 2011

Everybody go Buy Skyward Sword!

Okay, so I would like to say no, I haven't played this game yet, but one thing all the critics can agree is this is the best Zelda game yet. Based on the trailers, I wouldn't say that, seeing as nothing really amazed me, but hey, nobody said you absolutey have to put the Best part of your game in the trailer, just something to hook the gamer in. The story I know so far is there's basically an elf who likes a blond harp-playing elf, she eh gives him a skyward sword (i know you know what I'm talking about, so face-palm... NOW). However, while riding magical bird-things, the blond one falls off and a flying whale eats her. Determined to save her, the elf takes up the mantle of Link, and visits many lands, including a volcanoe, mine, and desert. Link also has a bunch more abilities, like the ability to use his sword as a metal detector to find items, makes sense to me, and a weird flying thing to fit in places Link can't. Now why should you be excited about this? Doesn't sound like anything special? Well, the best game ever made in the history of man was a little game called Ocarina of Time, which averages a 98%, and was a Zelda title. People are saying this is the best Zelda title yet, so do the math and this is the new BEST GAME EVER MADE. Sorry Half-Life, Halo, the door is to your left. BUY THIS!

Bionicle Story Part 6

Like a shining bullet of Death, Ghoe fell from the sky. At a raise of his arm, twin pillars of shadoa erupted from his fingertips and narrowly missed Teku, reducing a building to rubble in seconds. As Teku broke from the group of assembled Toa to avoid chunks of debris, green energy lanced off his spear in a weak offensive, which only msnaged to get Ghoe to lose his balance for a second. The other Toa where too preoccupied with the army of firedtone seals erupting from the ground and kidnapping villagers. Ghoe landed like a rock square on his feet, unharmed.
As the seals where making off with much more matoran, it became apparent that something huge was needed to fence them in. Mesarou rose his gauntlet up in the sky, and from his palm a swirling inferno ensued, creating a perimeter for the seals, and burning any daring ones. Ghoe calmly walked up to the Toa, his stormcloud now acting as a cloke of darkness.
Reunited, Senevtry, Straughteny, Teku, and Mesarou stood united, weapons meeted together for a combined elemental attack. Ghoe lifted up his arm and a pillar of black energy the size of a building blasted the Toa, whose combined might only held back the onslaught for half a second before they themselves where scattered like mice.
Ubrubtly, Mesarou got up to see if his friend Teku was still alive. Teku only stared deadly at him.
"Teku, Teku come on. Don't leave me brother!" Mesarou said through pained sadness, unable to cry being a Toa of fire to the loss of his friend. "You've survived so much, so many years--why fall now?"
Shocked, just a couple feet away, Straughteny looked on in horror.
In a dull, low voice, Mesarou's gaze shifted to Ghoe. "You." Picking up his shield with new determination, Mesarou ran. He ran with the fire of vengeance. He ran with the power of death. He ran for Teku. "You shall not survive this encounter!!!" With thst, Mesarou sprang and narrowly missed an endless pillar of shadow. "Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!" Palm outstretched, with all his might, Mesarou pumped every ounce of heat out to Ghoe, who was slammed to the ground by the shear force, heat condtantly assaulting his and melting a huge hole around him, until he slipped into the sea. Exhausted, Mesarou fell back to earth, satisfied Ghoe had been defeated.
But it would not last. Like an earthquake, the land began to tremble, and like a rocket, Ghoe shot out of the water, and erupted another pillar of shadow, which Mesarou lifted his shield weakly to defend.
"Noooooooo!!!" Senevtry watched on in horror as Mesarou was blasted aside like a wet doll, armor getting blown off his very frame, until his weak form smashed into the ice with a sickening crunch.
"Don't do something you'll regret," Starughteny said as he grabbed Senevtry's arm sadly. "It is more important that we get whatever matoran we can to safety, see-"
"Don`t YOU JUST RELIZE WHAT JUST HAPPENED? HE MUST PAY. Our brothers are dead and are never going to rise again. Don't you care-"
"My dear friend, don't believe that I don't, you must know by now that we cannot overcome this. Now, we can hide the matoran in the Toa Suva Chamber. If we hurry and with your power over rock, we can sava a dozen more than if we die here, Now come, we must hurry."

To Be Continued....,

Nov 19, 2011

The Smurfs Volume 1 Review

Sorry folks for this little draught I've had for reviews, but hey, why don't I review this, something I've been putting off for a long time- and with good reason. This is The Smurfs.
Now, when I say Smurfs I don't mean any of that spin-off crap like Smurf babies, no I'm talking about the original eighties show. This is simply volume one, the first five episodes, so I would like you to keep in mind this isn'f the whole show, just volume one.
So for the first couple episodes it focuses mainly on the Smurfs, shocker, right?, as apparently they live in a world where the seasons change every week. Seriously, in the first episode it went to summer, winter to summer again in a week. And only one Smurf was prepared, which of course is his only personality trait. Now I know what you're thinking "How can a character with only one personality appear anything but two dimensional?" Well, I'll tell you.
The Smurfs, like Snow White and the Seven Dwarves before it, has characters named after personality trsuts. Whereas in Snow White, the dwarves arr cleverly named "Happy" or "Grumpy", the Smurfs go a step further and slap "Smurf" to the end of their name. However, although in the Smurfs their given character trait dominates their personality, i.e. Angry Smurf is angry, there is still some depth, like for example Angry Smurf isn't always angry, and some actually combat their trait and overcome it (which should lead to a name change). Anyways, bottom line is, they are mostly two dimensional, but not completely, but thankfully Hanna-Barbara figured seeing as there are a lot of Smurfs, they can get away with skimping on the character development for most if The Smurfs.
So anyways, snow. It unexpectantly snows, and only one smurf is prepared (he made a jacket), while the rest freeze to death and basically get sick. However, to cure themselves, they need some Smurfroot, so original, to cure themselves, which all the stupid, lazy smurfs forgot to get ( I don't think those are actual Smurfs), so of course the Smurf with the coat goes out, get it, gets chased by Gargamel and boom! Everything turns out well.
The second episode, if I remember right, is about Brainy Smurf basically keeping tabs on everyone like a stalker while Papa Smurf, the only one who dares to wear red, puts himself in a coma after he has to fix something that apparently drained his energy completely, because just sleeping it off would just be silly, right? Well, as nobody does any work-shocker- Brainy Smurf apparently gets bored, decides to stalk his family, and does laundry. Now, him being the smartest of The Smurfs, of course he messes this up and Gargamel, a middle-aged screwup of a wizard, finds them and follows the scent of the clothes right to the Smurf's camp. Of course, the other Smurfs take Brainy's actions as traiterous, and decide to lock him up in a room with plenty of stuff to help him escape and they don't even LOCK THE DOOR. God, these people are dumbasses! They deserve to be invaded! Anyways, Papa Smurf wakes up and throws a potion at Gargamel that makes him trade places with his cat Azrael, while not wiping his mind so he can come back later.
The next couple episodes focus mainly on Yohan and Peewee, two mideval, um, teenagers who um, go to random places to do good and um, know the Smurfs somehow. Honestly! These characters seem to be soley created because the creators where probably like "Hey, we have a mideval world. And you know that Dungeons and Dragons thingee? They have one too. But where they have Big strong warriors, we have little blue... children. You, make a warrior, no a teenage warrior with a little puke sidekick. The kids'll just eat that stuff up." And indeed they did. Being a Golden Sun fan, Yohan really did apeal to me, and if he lost Peewee, his annoying midget sidekick, got some better artists and got a game of his own, I probably would like it. As it is, Yohan and Peewee get two whole episodes dedicated to them, one where they must find the heir to an old castle so a ghost can finally join his friends, don't ask, and one where an evil wizard tries to overthrow a kibg. Both are a good break from the usual Smurf storyline, not that I don't like it, it's just that a little break now and again is appreciated where the Smurfs take the backseat. Of all the episodes surprisingly these two have the least stupid, and don't worry, The Smurfs are still present.
Now to the last episode. My god, This one has some festival where some mystical swamp fire is needed. Don't ask, but through a berry-picking activity Scaredy Smurf is chossn, which of course he chickens out, and he has a Smurf that can't say "no" do it for him. And of course he screws up, so turns out a moro swamp monster who apparently doesn't know that they could just reignite the stupid Foxfire, yes that's what it's called, with the damn torch IN THE SMURF'S HANDS. The whole episode is basically the Smurfs undoing that one mistake, an guess what? It includes a musical number by Papa Smurf. Too bad it's in monotone.
In all, The Smurfs tv show Volume 1 was an interesting look in the past. For eighties shows, it's really good, seeing as though the animation can be fun to look at and the writing does see some clever moments, it also seems to lag at times. In the opening, I still find it creepy that the Smurfs are so excited from a kiss from Smurfette, seeing as she technically is their sister. Oh, and if you replace Smurf with a swear everytime they say it, it can lead to some funny dialogue.

Final Score: B+

Nov 8, 2011

On Justin Bieber and Michael Jackson


Oh god folks. This is it. I finally go over MJ and Bieber with you, IN THE SAME POST. Please, if you have weak constitutions please run screaming to your right, otherwise remain seated and see what I have to say.
Now let's start with how I initially thought about Justin Bieber. Back then, he was just an average dude with cool hair (I learned to hate it later), and his one main song wasb"Baby", which back before it had been pounded into my skull thanks to the radio, I actually liked. Most songs are about events in the singer's life, and I actually liked the whole story of his rejection and also how he rose to popularity, spiting that person. I didn't initially have a problem with his voice, hey Michael Jackson sung in a relatively high voice, too, and while people may make fun of it, that certaintly isn't a factor why people don't like him personally.
People didn't care about MJ because his music improved to the point where he earned the name king of pop, whereas with Bieber his music went downhill, but something funny with Bieber is many critics don't flat out say "I don't like him because of his music", no they go after his voice. Personally, I think that this is generally because the average citizen, especially males have this small prejudice and unneasiness with high-voiced males, and Bieber is a prime chance to jump at the people's hysteria to advance their own popularity further. Others, however actually sensibly judge him on his actions, like his "Bieber Baby", which didn't surprise or change my opinion of him at all. What, Joe Jonus is allowed to punch a five-year old but Justin Bieber can't have a kid that will probably grow up with more money than any of you reading this will have? Weird.
However, again with the MJ comparisan, Michael Jackson was the complete opposite. His music was so good that most of us ignored the fact he might've been a child rapist, who had a high voice, a combination that will not earn you many friends in our American Society. Again, I like MJ because I like his product, whereas I just don't like Beiber or the Irate Gamer for another example because I don't like their products. In a way, his declining quality seems to make his other qualities seem worse, like his hair for example, which isn't too bad. No, you guys should be making fun of Katie Perry's hair more than Bieber's. The last bit of hate is probably centered around his age, but guys, remember, he isn't 16 anymore, I believe he's around 18 now, so he's basically an adult now, and to tell you the truth, compared to other celebrities in his position, he has done remarkebly well with handling his fame. Oh, and one last thing. His movie. Due to the epic failure of not only his and Fred's movies, for some reason I feel as if he's sort of ruined it for other Youtube sensations. Don't believe me? Well just look how hard the Angry Video Game Nerd (James Rolfe) has had finding a company to support his movie. Personally, I don't see a reason NOT to entrust your fortunes in his movie, seeing as after 100+ episodes and just about 10 years of experience, there has not been a decrease in quality for his videos and each get 1 million + views, so why WOULDN'T you entrust him. Come on Universal! Just end your horrible Barbie movies and make room for the nerd in your budget!